Break ups are extremely difficult for both the initiator of the breakup and the one on the receiving end. It will break hearts and in most cases both parties will feel the pain, but needless to say the person who’s getting dumped would be most hurt by the experience. If you were the initiator of the break up you are most likely not reading this, so I’ll safely assume that you were on the receiving end and I’ll help you recover from this terrible experience with such assumption.
Follow the next steps to getting over a breakup:
Accept the end
The first step you take after a breakup will determine how quickly you will bounce back from this experience and how badly you could suffer through this ordeal. Take the brave and mature first step by accepting that your relationship has come to an end and deal with the subsequent negative emotion as best as you can. The sooner you accept the reality, the sooner you’ll stop hurting.
You are allowed to grieve
Once you have come to peace with accepting the end, allow yourself to grieve and don’t keep your emotions bottled up inside you. Speak to friends and family about how you feel and let them know you are hurting. Grieving is an important step to healing and one that will ultimately give you closure.
Don’t assign blames
Don’t blame yourself or your ex for the breakup. Assigning blames now does not help anyone and it only brings back bad memories. No matter how hard you try to not think of your ex, you will undoubtedly think of him or her for quite some time. Keep a positive attitude and try to think of the good things you two have shared, this will actually help you heal in the long run.
you watch this video
Get spoiled
I don’t want you to ruin your finances and spend your way into bankruptcy, but you should spoil yourself a little for a while. Take a vacation if you can or give yourself a gift you’ve been putting off to save an extra buck. Where will you get the money for this? You’d be surprised how much money people spend on average on their lovers, you’ll be able to be a lot more generous to yourself until you are hitched again.
Reconnect with your family
As wonderful as a lover’s relationship is, it can be very taxing on all other relationships that are equally important to us. How many times has your family played a second fiddle to your girlfriend or boyfriend? Take this time to reconnect with your family and seek out their love and support as well.
Time is your ally
You are wise enough to understand that the breakup will hurt for some time. Your mind and soul will heal with time, do this right and you know you will come out of this a better person. People live on even when their loved ones have passed on prematurely and some live a fuller life due to such tragedy. I am not trying to diminish your pain. However, I am hoping to show you how people even in the worst of the circumstances learn to make the best of them. Time will be your best friend in all this but only if you keep the right attitude.
Move on
Live an active life and speak your mind with friends and family on a regular basis about your feelings and your plans for the future. Surround yourself with people that love you and you will heal in no time. Don’t try to date again right after the breakup, but don’t hesitate to meet new people when you feel that you are ready. If the thought of meeting new people excites you, then you are most likely ready to start dating again. Try Match.com 7-day Free Trial and just have fun with it until the trial runs out. Think of it as eye-shopping or a little warm up for the real deal, but most importantly just have fun with it.
Latest Q&A